CHANGE

Track: Adele: Melt My Heart to Stone

Mood: Relaxed

CHANGE

Greetings blogworld! I pray this post finds you all in the nest of health and the highest of spirits. A new friend of mine (SHOUT OUT @ CHAREICE) asked me to write about "Change". She wanted to know my perspective, so I thought I'd share. It requires a little background on my personality.

My life is very calculated. The moves I make are very meticulous and strategic. I have to have a reason for everything and I have to know the next move before I make the first one. Have you ever made plans to hang out with friends and then fall through. Either people flake or life gets in the way? Yea, that happens to me all the time.

I've made plans for my entire life. At this age, I should have a masters degree, making 100k a year, self employed, and living a life of luxury ... and yet none of the aforementioned things are happening. There is a quote that I enjoy, but can't remember who said it "Life is what happens when you're busy making plans". For me, this rings true. I was tired of making plans that never work out.

Obama won his historical election based on the idea and the concept of change. No, not that stuff left over after you break a dollar. Real change.

One day I sat in front of my computer and thought..."Something different has to happen IMMEDIATELY!" Now, I don't recommend everyone do what I did, but it worked for me. I logged on to Facebook and posted as my status "Where should I move: Florida, Georgia, DC, New York, or Virginia?" The people spoke and I listened. I began looking for a job and a little over a month later I was living in Alpharetta, Georgia.

Positive change is always good. Sometimes you have to do something different if you expect different results. I wanted different results, so I didn't PLAN, I just DID. One thing you have to keep in mind is that, sometimes things get worse before they get better, but they ALWAYS get better. Until be meet again, be blessed.

Peace and love ...

Track: The Black Keys: Tighten Up

Mood: Numb

WHY

Greetings Blogworld?! I hope this post finds you in the best of health and the highest of spirits. It seems like ages since my last post. I'm working on consistency. I'm just gonna jump into this post...

On Saturday September 4th, I was leaving work and an acquaintance was walking out in front of me. When I got to my car, she called me over to hers.

She said,"Anthony, you know I appreciate all you do, right?"
I replied,"Of course."
She grabbed me and gave me a tight hug and said, "I love you. Have a good weekend."
"I love you too." I said. "Have a good weekend also."

On Monday September 6th, with a gun as her accomplice, she took her own life. Because I wasn't there I will never know the true details of what happened. One can only wonder what would cause a seemingly happy teacher, mother, wife, and daughter to turn a gun on herself and pull the trigger.

Of course when the news broke at work everyone and their mother had a theory as to what happened. "She was really stressed and just could take it anymore." Okay. "She was on heavy anti depressants and you know suicidal thoughts and behaviors are side effects." Okay. "Her husband was trying to divorce her." Okay. Again, because I wasn't there, I refuse to believe the stories that people conjure up.

On some level, I think suicide is selfish. You brought us joy and you took that away from us. Or maybe that's just me being selfish. I wonder about the child, husband, grandchildren, mother, and friends that she left behind. The church was at capacity during the funeral and the funeral home was standing room only during the visitation. She was loved. I can't help but think that had she known how loved she truly was, maybe things could have been different. Maybe not.

A smile can hide a lot of pain. Again, I don't know all the details to this situation, but I do know that suicide is nothing but a permanent solution to a temporary problem. There's always another choice.

Until we meet again,

Peace and love...

Track: Lauryn Hill: Light My Fire

Mood: Anti

Hip Hop...

Beat box some hip hop back in my heartbeat
And gimme the rhythm so I can tap my feet.

Freestyle some freedom back in my mind,
Cause I can take these tired lyrics time after time.

Graffiti the word "LOVE" all over me,
So I can remember how I feel about thee.

These days I don't know what's going on,
But the hip hop I used to know seems so far gone.

I don't think you realize how much you mean to me.
Now you're just a vacant shell of what you used to be.

I wanna lace up my Adidas again and tip my Kangol,
And rock steady to the beat so hard it vibrates my soul.

I wanna break dance battle. I don't wanna lean and rock,
I wanna two step with my lady, she don't wanna pop, lock, and drop.

Music's met a foe called capitalism and conformity.
We need a hip hop hero with a sick flow over a dope beat.

Once upon a time music's all that seemed to matter.
Now I'm desperately seeking my happily ever after.

When you say something worthy of being placed in a song,
Then and only then will I put my headphones back on.

Track: Destiny's Child: Free

Mood: Relaxed

SWEET FREEDOM

Greetings Blogworld! I hope this post finds you all in the best of health and the highest of spirits! Now, I'm goin in!!

Have you ever met someone who is everything you never knew you wanted? Have you ever found what you thought was love even when you weren’t looking for it? Ladies, have you ever been swept off your feet so quickly that you didn’t even notice when you lost your footing? Have you ever dove so deep into love that you don’t even remember taking the leap? I have.

Love is a blind leap of faith. You’re basically dropping all inhibitions and restrictions in order to give someone all you have to offer. We take this leap in the hopes that the object of our affection will reciprocate the feelings and leap with us, or at least catch us when we fall. It’s beautiful when love works. It’s powerful when someone loves you as much as you love them. It’s soothing to know that someone has the power to crush you, but won’t.

But what if they do? What if the love you thought was the most powerful thing in the world wasn’t? You call that person your “other half” and now it’s over. How do you cope with that? It’s simple. You mourn the loss of your relationship and you move on. Cry if you need to. You do whatever it takes, within reason, to feel whole again. This journey from love to loss and single again is a difficult one and it takes people different times to cope with this newly found freedom.
A serious breakup is a lot like death and grief. In a sense you are mourning the death of a relationship. The five stages are: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and eventually acceptance. You’ll tell yourself that you all will get back together. Denial. You’ll get mad and perhaps even take it out on his or her clothes, car, etc. Anger. You’ll suggest you all remain friends and you may or may not mean it. Bargaining. You’ll feel sorry for yourself. You’ll blame yourself and not want to eat, sleep or go out. Depression. Eventually, you will be okay with the break up. Acceptance. Getting to that acceptance is a difficult process.

Your friends will try to hook you up with new people … new people that you will compare to your old love. They say that the best way to get over an old love is to get under a new one. That won’t work. You’ll often look at old photos, old letters, etc and old feelings will resurface. The pain is still there. They still have the ability to control how you feel. They can ruin or make your day based on how they treat you.

At some point, you will be okay. At some point, you will look at the same old photos, old letters, etc and feel NOTHING. No feels of wanting to get back together. No feelings of inadequacy. No feelings of depression. No feelings of pain. NOTHING. You’re free. This person no longer has the ability to control how you feel and you’ve never felt better. SWEET FREEDOM.

Until we meet again ...

Peace and love ...

My Other Half?

Track: The Script: The Man Who Can't Be Moved

Mood: Aloof

MY OTHER HALF?

Greetings blogworld! I pray this entry finds you all in the best of health and the highest of spirits.

So, I was thinking today, why do people call their significant others their "other half"? I don't know about you, but I'm a whole person. I don't want to date a partial woman. I'm a LIBRA and according to the sign, I'm seeking balance in life and love. I also don't like when people say stuff like "you complete me".

I see relationships as more of two strong entities coming together to become a force. I don't think it's healthy to rely on another person to come into your life before you feel complete. Perhaps this is why I'm single. Who knows. What do you all think? Sound off.

Until we meet again ...

Peace and love...

Get Some Power...

Track: Michelle Williams: Purpose in Your Storm

Mood: Chill

Greetings blogworld! I pray this entry finds you in the best of health and the highest of spirits.

Ok, I'm just going to dive in with this topic. I don't go to church. I haven't gone to church regularly in a long time. Honestly, there is very little that I miss about it. I miss the people that I've met and I miss singing on the choir, kinda.

Now, don't think that I'm some heathen who doesn't acknowledge God because that is not the case. I pray often. I read the bible. I meditate. I give God his 10%. There are many things I used to partake in that I choose not to now. I just don't attend church regularly.

My friends and I were talking candidly with a preacher who may have gotten a little too comfortable and made a statement that didn't sit well with me. He said, "I hope church is packed Sunday. I need a new watch." Initially, I laughed and then I got offended. I questioned his statement and he claimed to have been joking. I believe all jokes have a core of truth. As we continued talking, my friends made plans to go to a club the following weekend and the preacher asked if he could meet us there. Again, this didn't sit well with me and I posed the question, "can preachers go to clubs?" He replied, "preaching is my job. I gotta have a life outside of church." I was speechless. I think that once God calls AND chooses you, your life is now to bring souls to HIM. There is no "clocking out" or "time off". This is a large part of what deters people from going to church. Crooked preachers preaching nonsense for personal gain.

I have met the biggest hoes, liars, thieves, crooks, drunks, and everything else you can think of in church. And this is where I should go for spiritual growth? I'm not saying that there are no real dedicated people in church, but I've met some real characters. I've seen too many people do that same thing too many times. I'm over the whole "lets give God the glory" while we're in HIS house and act a foolish mess when they leave. I'm not perfect and never claim to be, but I'm tired of the "Holier than thou" people who raise the most hell.

I consider myself spiritual. I think the term "religious" is too closed minded. Now, don't get me wrong, I thank God for HIS blessings, I pray before I make major decisions, etc. Who knows, maybe I will make it back to church and join again.

I hope I don't offend anyone with this post. Actually, I don't care if I offend anyone with this post. If you're offended then maybe you should rethink what you contribute to church. Shouting is great, but I refuse to celebrate a dead praise. get some power and holla at me later.

With much passion and conviction, until we meet again...

Peace and love...

HAPPY

Happy

Mood: elated

Track: Natasha Bedingfield: Happy

Greetings blogworld! I pray this post finds you in the highest of spirits and the best of health. Now I know it's been ages since my last post. Honestly, there has been a lot going on, but instead of jotting it all down for me to blog about later, I simply tweet it. Sorry. I'm on my way back though.

The older I get the more I realize how much the little things in life matter. I've always been the type to appreciate the small things, but it's becoming more obvious as I age. I truly believe that life is what you make it. Take a moment to look around at the things you have, not the material things because they come and go. Look at the things that really matter. As Natasha Bedingfield sings in the song 'Happy', "Got my dreams, got my life, got my love. Got my friend, got the sunshine above. Why am I making this hard on myself when there's so many beautiful reasons I have to be happy."

Check out the song below. It really puts things in perspective. Even when negative things seem to be all around, there are still so many beautiful reasons to be happy.

Until we meet again,

Peace and love...